“My name is Erica, and I’m an addict. It took me 20 years to say these words, but these are the words that saved my life. I started smoking hash when I was 23, leading to taking ecstasy, speed, and cocaine. After 13 years, I eventually was able to give the drugs up apart from one – cannabis. People say it is harmless, but for me, it wasn’t. I would get weed on tick from dealers, sometimes running bills up to €800. I had no job, but I didn’t care. I had to have my fix; once I had my drugs, I was happy.

Five years ago, I remember thinking I can’t do this anymore. I had no life. I lied to my parents. I had no money and depended on my dad to buy me clothes and put a roof over my head. My mental health started to suffer. I thought I had hit rock bottom, but it wasn’t my rock bottom. I went into two detox centres but relapsed after leaving them. I decided to give it one last try and went into the Coolmine Drug Rehab Centre in Dublin.

I did a cannabis reduction course there. It took me a year and a half to get away from cannabis. Coolmine never gave up on me, and I will always be grateful for that.
We had to give a urine sample twice a week, and my next step was to get into the day centre. One day one of my key workers suggested that I go to Ashleigh house and do the six months residential program. So on the 10th of May 2018, I arrived at Ashleigh house in Damastown, Dublin. I started my program, and it helped me to deal with the ghosts of my past. It’s not easy, but it is worth it. I completed my six months and went back to Tullamore. Coolmine didn’t want me to go home, but I promised to attend the step-down daily. Step-down is the second part of the treatment, and I had to be in Dublin by 10.30 am every weekday. I never missed a day. 
Two months later, I was in the next phase of my treatment – aftercare. Every Monday night, I had to go to Dublin, give a urine sample and go to the Coolmine aftercare group. I graduated in September this year. My family was there, and I stood up and spoke about my journey.

I never once thought I’d be so happy in life, but I am, and I don’t ever what to throw away what I have right now. Since being in Coolmine, I was offered a voyage with Tall Ships. I took it and have memories I will cherish forever. I have also been offered a job as a mentor with the Tall Ships starting next spring. I used to hate myself so much I couldn’t look in the mirror, but now I can, and I’m okay with myself. I’m proud of myself, and I can wake up in the morning with a clear head; that is priceless for me. For anyone who thinks they can’t do it or that they had done it before and relapsed, please don’t give up. Keep trying, and you will get it. I did and now look at me. 

Every addict is worth their recovery”.